IS CETA A DEAD PARROT OR A ZOMBIE?
Sounding more and more like Monty Python’s parrot sketch, this morning, EU political chiefs, including Manfred Weber and Guy Verhofstadt, insisted CETA was not dead. Greens MEP Reinhard Bütikofer said it was “three-quarters dead”.
Of course, it has nothing to do with them really. They aren’t even in the right parliament.
“Only the Belgians can decide on Belgium’s position,” Tusk said. He added that Canada was the “most European country outside Europe”.
Canada isn’t European at all – it’s creating jobs and people want to sleep with its leader.
But this is not the time for recrimination. That’s tomorrow, probably.
So, no mention here of how the European Commission brought this on itself by giving into pressure from member states and making CETA a mixed agreement, handing Wallonia an effective veto.
Forget that the future of all EU trade policy, including the US-EU deal TTIP, is up in the air (#prayforDGTrade).
I certainly won’t say people should just accept this democratic result, even if they don’t like it, and move on. You know, like I have with Brexit.
Belgian Prime Minister Charles Michel’s dad Louis was deputy prime minister. Justin Trudeau’s dad Pierre was prime minister of Canada. Both constitutional monarchies love their royal families.
Both have francophone regions that love pop icon Claude François.
The French look down their noses at Belgians. Americans do the same to Canadians.
Far more unites the two nations than divides them. CETA could yet rise from the mortuary slab and stagger, zombie-like, over the finishing line.
Michel Barnier, the Commission’s Brexit negotiator, continues his first-class trolling of Britain with this amazing tweet from the Museum of Broken Relationships.
Martin Schulz has referred the UKIP Parliament punch-up to the French authorities. One of the accused MEPs invited Schulz and Weber to step outside the Parliament yesterday. Schulz told MEP Mike Hookem he’d be very happy to see him in court. Meanwhile,Nigel Farage: The Sitcom is happening…
Commissioner Bienkowska said, “We are in space for the long haul.” Well, space is pretty big and quite far away…
Matteo Renzi is getting tough with the EU on refugee policy, threatening a veto on the bloc’s budget.
MEP Sven Giegold said Commissioners should not get a Christmas bonus.
Don’t miss this video interview with MEP Ian Duncan. The Scottish Tory talks Brexit, climate change and EU reform. He also asks Manfred Weber how exactly he is going to pay for all those free Interrail holidays…
The Commission will rule on whether to ease Russian access on a Gazprom pipeline link to Germany, which could have repercussions for Ukraine.
Before the UK referendum, Prime Minister Theresa May warned Goldman Sachs that businesses would quit Brexit Britain. Ireland is wooing the London-based European Banking Authority and investors reckon that, in the end, the US will strike a Swiss-style deal with the EU.
LOOK OUT FOR…
Trudeau, the Justin Bieber of world politics, could be coming to Brussels to sign CETA! He has discreet tattoos and a winning smile! Here is a video of the studly beefcake performing striptease. Federica Mogherini will be at the NATO meeting of defence ministers in Brussels.