Tweets of the Week: Afghanistan, Bled Strategic Forum, German Triell

Afghan situation leaves Europe stressed, the Bled Strategic Forum is a total sausage fest and German chancellor wannabes are put to the test.

Welcome back! It’s September. Did you have nice holidays? Well you can forget about that now, because we’re going to talk about *that* EU statement on Afghanistan!

It was notably “light” on substance!

American EU Dude described it as quite extra-ordinary. And snarked:

“Ministers took note of the situation in Afghanistan…”

Wow, great!

Altiero Spaghetti is just back from holiday and already feeling incredibly cynical as a result. https://twitter.com/EU_Spaghetti/status/1433072408643219460

 

Matina Stevis also pointed out that the EU narratives on Afghanistan are all over the place!
“We support Afghans, especially women and girls BUT we don’t want “migrants”. And everyone who needs asylum will get it BUT not if they arrive illegally AND MAYBE the Taliban is not so bad BUT we can’t deport AND maybe we want to”

Clear as mud.

 

European Parliament President David Sassoli was disappointed with the Home Affairs Council. We cannot pretend that the Afghan question does not concern us, he said.

The New York Times reckons that Europe needs a wake up call on Afghanistan, to which Tom Nuttall retorted: Europe seems to get half a dozen wake-up calls every year. Has anyone checked for narcolepsy?

I can think of a few other conditions they should check for while they’re at it!

 

Naturally Afghanistan was high on the agenda at the Bled Strategic Forum, but the forum scored an epic fail on diversity!

 

The future of Europe seems to be a male preserve, said Danièle Weber.

Vice President of the European Commission, Dubravka Suica, was the only woman participating alongside 12 men. And Not a single person of colour was included, added Caoilfhionn Gallagher.

So there you have it the #FutureOfEurope is white, male, middle-aged and has a serious penchant for navy designer suits. 

 

Do they all shop in the same M&S menswear department as well? Quipped Gibraltar Monkey.

Manspreading And ‘Splaining Rife At Slovenia’s ‘Future Of Europe’ Panel ran, Le Chou’s headline

Wait… I thought Le Chou was supposed to be parody!

 

Let’s hope the future of the Future of Europe is less of a sausage fest.

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Finally this week, the German election is just four weeks away and the first of three TV debates between candidates Olaf Scholz, Armin Laschet and Annalena Baerbock took place on Sunday.

With the hashtag #Triell trending, Jens Prausnitz started picturing the good, the bad, and the ugly. 

Nassreddin Taibi asked Who won the debate?

Because, of course, we have to treat a debate like a football match.

 

Not sure who “won”, but the general consensus is that Laschet definitely lost.

Jon Worth also thought Scholz was so sodding boring!

Stefan Leifert gave us this handy list of the major European policy issues that will shape this election campaign:

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Uhhh?

Are you saying we’re irrelevant?!

That’s it for this week. Join me again next Friday for more cheers, fears and jeers in the Brussels Bubble Twittersphere.