Tweets of the Week: Selmayr’s promotion, Barroso’s ethics, and Mad Max Brexit

Welcome to Tweets of the Week. This week, Selmayr’s promotion sparks attacks, Barroso’s ethics are allegedly lax, and post-Brexit Britain won’t be like Mad Max.

On Wednesday, Juncker’s right-hand man Martin Selmayr – described by the FT as “one of the most powerful and contentious backroom figures in Brussels” – became Secretary General of the European Commission.

The Commission reckons he’s like Picard taking over from Captain Kirk… really?!

Ryan Heath says Selmayr has won the 2019 election before it even started. Who needs #Spitzenkandidaten?

And revealed that Commissioners were only told about the promotion minutes before it was announced.

Camino Mortera said Selmayr might need a re-brand as there was nothing more delightfully EU-esque than a Dutch man with a German-sounding name called ‘Italianer’ at the head of the European Commission.

The ECR Group was skeptical about how “open and fair” the competition for the top job was.

Parody account Martini Seltzermayr tweeted: “After giving myself a very tough interview I decided that, on balance, I was the right candidate for the job.”

And Juncker attempted to head off jobs-for-boys criticism by saying Selmayr has “many qualities to fulfil his mission.”

Selmayr’s replacement as Juncker’s head of cabinet, Clara Martinez Alberola, is the first woman to hold the position.

And as of Wednesday, the percentage of women in management at the Commission has grown substantially.

Including the first woman in charge of Eurostat, Mariana Kotseva.

Staying with the Commission, former president Jose Manuel Barroso was back in the firing line this week for allegedly lobbying the commission on behalf of Goldman Sachs.

Commission Vice President Jyrki Katainen confirmed he met with Barroso in October.

But said they are friends and Barroso did not actually lobby him. All they did was “go for a beer.”

Juncker also defended Barroso saying he is “not a gangster.”

In response to the news, Competition Commissioner Margrethe Vestager said she simply doesn’t meet with lobbyists, and that makes her life very easy.

But Laurence Norman wondered which is more damning for Barroso: Vestager calling him a lobbyist or Juncker calling him a friend!

Finally, a lesson in setting the bar ridiculously low: David Davis said on Monday that Brexit won’t plunge Britain into a “Mad Max Dystopia.”

Louise Day wasn’t so sure: “A terrifying, relentless, treacherous journey in pursuit of a former utopia that no longer exists…” sounds like Mad Max to me.

But if Brexit isn’t Mad Max, what film is it? Ahhh this is what Twitter was made for!

Suggestions include The Great Escape, V for Vendetta, Titanic, Looney Toons…

And a few films that haven’t been made yet, like Brexit at Tiffany’s, There’s Something About May, Honey I Shrunk the Economy…

And of course the photoshoppers were out in force. Our favourite is Guy Emanuel’s dystopian vision of Prime Minister’s Question Time.

This week we are supported by FoodDrinkEurope. To celebrate the single market’s 25th birthday, they invite you to share a photo of your pantry using the hashtag #PantriesofEurope.

That’s all for this week. Join me again next week for more laughs and gaffes in the Brussels Bubble Twittersphere and send in your suggestions using the hashtag #EUTweets.

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